At a recent Enterprise Connect awards ceremony, one of the honorees stepped up to the mic and said something that’s been echoing in my head ever since:
“This award means a lot because our work is usually thankless. We don’t hear ‘thank you.’ We don’t get recognized.”
What struck me wasn’t just what he said—but how the room responded.
There was no hush. No discomfort. Just quiet nods, like everyone already accepted it.
As if thankless work is the price of admission.
But here’s the truth: That price is too high.
People are barely holding it together. And the expectation that they’ll keep grinding indefinitely without acknowledgment isn’t just unsustainable—it’s damaging.
This isn’t a rant. It’s a warning. From someone who’s spent two decades in customer experience and people leadership, watching how good people slowly lose their spark.
We need to talk about what happens when we normalize silence.
Recognition Isn’t a Perk. It’s the Minimum.
We’ve built a myth around the “quiet high performer”—someone who doesn’t need praise, doesn’t need validation, doesn’t even need to be seen. Just point them at the goal and let them run.
But even the strongest runners need water.
When people never hear that their work matters, here’s what happens:
- They stop going the extra mile.
- They stop believing their effort makes a difference.
- Eventually, they stop showing up—mentally, emotionally, or entirely.
And let’s be real: you might not see it right away. They’ll still hit deadlines. Still show up to meetings. But the light will start to fade.
Not because they’re weak.
Because they’re human.
The Problem? We’ve Made Recognition Transactional.
Somewhere along the way, appreciation got industrialized. We wrapped it in process. We timed it to calendars. We watered it down.
Now we’ve got:
- Quarterly shout-outs
- Peer-nominated awards
- Prewritten “thank you” templates that feel more HR than human
And it’s not just that these efforts fall flat. It’s that they retrain people. Recognition becomes something you earn only when you’re visible, loud, or perfectly aligned with what leadership already values.
Everyone else? Left wondering if what they do matters at all.
This isn’t a lack-of-effort issue. It’s a lack-of-intent issue.
We’ve built systems that accidentally reward performance theater while ignoring meaningful impact.
If You Want People to Stay—And Stay Engaged—Make Recognition Real Again.
You don’t need a big budget or a new tool. You need to shift your mindset.
Here’s where to start:
1. Tie Recognition to Real Impact
Praise should never be vague. Make it specific, and connect it to something that matters.
“That process you redesigned didn’t just save time—it helped the team breathe again.”
2. Make It Personal, Not Performative
Skip the public parade if it doesn’t fit. A quiet, direct “I saw what you did and it mattered” can mean more than a spotlight ever will.
3. Say It When You See It
Don’t bank it for later. Don’t wait for performance reviews. Recognition delayed is recognition denied.
This Isn’t About Soft Culture. It’s About Human Limits.
Look, people don’t need applause every time they hit “send.”
But they do need to know someone sees them. That their work matters. That they matter.
Not once a year. Not when it’s convenient. But when it counts.
Let’s stop measuring resilience by how long someone can go without encouragement.
Let’s start building cultures where silence isn’t the norm—and where acknowledgment doesn’t require a ceremony.
Because if people have to win an award just to feel seen, something is seriously broken.
